Thursday, March 11, 2004

 
Why?

I'm having a very bad week, folks, and if you don't want to hear complaining, keep movin' along.

Saturday I found out that my mom has pneumonia. Again. For the second time since late December. She spent the days leading up to Christmas in the hospital, and was released to go back to the nursing home where she lives on Christmas Eve. At least she was home and on the mend for Christmas, but when home's a nursing home facility, I'd guess the return probably isn't as joyful as it might be under other (more normal) circumstances. My mom has Multiple Sclerosis, and it's been something my family has had to deal with for many years. She retired disability when I was in sixth grade. She's been non-ambulatory and in a nursing home since 1996. Pneumonia for bedbound/nonambulatory people is generally not a good development. And now that development has happened twice, not even a full three months apart.

The pneumonia apparently came back, and they diagnosed it again last week, but for some reason, family members weren't notified, and I found out in a somewhat unusual way, from a family member I don't really speak to, that Mom was very, very sick. I got a call after said family member paid mom a visit, and needless to say, both the news and the way in which I received it were upsetting. Pneumonia had led to fever and dehydration, and oxygen and an IV became necessary. Early this week she was on the mend, and they took her off the IV - whereupon she got worse. Yesterday they moved her to a different unit in the nursing home - a unit akin to a critical care ward in a hospital, where a larger and more skilled nursing staff can meet the needs of patients in fairly serious condition. The fever's under control, she's back on an IV, and they're pumping her full of protein, trying to make sure she's having her nutritional needs met, but she's still not doing well, from what I understand. And I am frustrated because I am a few thousand miles away, and because I can't talk to her at all. All of my information comes from my aunt, who is making sure Mom's being well-taken-care-of, and from my sister, who went to visit yesterday and gave me a report.

My spring break is next week, and I am most likely going to put myself into the hole financially to be able to swing a trip out there. She'll probably recover most of the way eventually (she will probably not recover fully, that's just the way things go), but then again, there aren't any guarantees.

I've got a ton of things to take care of right now, but I am having a really hard time concentrating on school, on teaching, on a lot of other things, because I'm frightened I am going to lose one of the most important people in my life, someone who has loved me and supported me and inspired me as few others have, and I am also afraid that if that loss does occur soon, I won't be there.

You know, occasionally, life really sucks. This, my friends, would be one of those times.

- posted by laurie @ 3/11/2004 10:19:00 AM
Comments: Post a Comment